Burberry, White Wine and a Porsche

These are most likely the top three things that come to mind when you think: City Bus.

First, The Burberry Addict was on my bus. She was donning a Burberry headband, a Burberry scarf, a Burberry sack and a Burberry jacket. Enough with the Burberry.

She was talking to her friends - who were also sporting at least one Burberry item. The female had a Burberry sack and the male a Burberry scarf.

It was like watching a Klan meeting - but instead of white hoods everyone had a Burberry item.

I was sitting there, minding the business of the Klan, when the scent of white wine shot up my nose.

yuck. I do not want to smell that. Who is the alcoholic with wino breath?

The scent of wine was coming and going and it was irritating me. I could not rest until I found the source.

After several minutes I realized it was the classy lady with the Burberry handbag. She was drinking wine out of a paper cup.

A paper cup. Wine in a paper cup.

I would have to be hard up for booze to consider drinking wine out of a paper cup.

I do not enjoy drinking anything out a paper cup. I'd rather slurp up a beverage out of my soiled palm. The thought of white wine, in particular, out of a paper cup made me vomit in my mouth.

eeeeewwwww. The thought of the taste of soaked paper mixed with wine was so repulsive that I could not decide which was worse: The current unpleasant scent or the odor of fresh piss on the the red line train.

However, I was focusing so much on that I failed to notice that the bus had not moved for several minutes.

What in the lord's name is going on?

It seems a Porcshe hit the bus and we were waiting for the police to come.

Reports stated that the Porsche tried to out run the bus from the right lane and ended up hitting the bus.

Return your Porsche immediately.

If your high performance automobile can not out run a CTA bus...your high performance automobile is defective.

2 comments:

The Kahles said...

Back in the SADDLE with the hilarious posts! I do hope the Burberry Four are on the bus when I am in Chicago.

Lindsey J said...

I want you to know I told someone about the guy yelling "suck my d*ck" at you and also the one who threw the starburst. I love how you never have a normal outing.