The Walk Signal

I have no car so - my bike and my legs are my only source of transportation.

I enjoy my smartphone as most do.  This afternoon a man was angry that I dared to cross the road while looking at my phone. 

I have had this happen before.  Years ago a truck driver was beeping at me because I was talking on my phone when I crossed the road.  I was on the phone with some friend when this happened and I got all crazy....I stopped in the middle of the road and was screaming at the guy. "wha? wha? What is your problem?"  This was probably circa summer of 2010 - 2011 - I had a lot of anger then.  Then some -perhaps out of homing man said "I think he is mad that you are on your phone".  "I have a walk signal! I can walk and talk on my phone!" I yelled.  " - you can.  I was just telling you what I think his problem was" he said...fearing me.

You know you have issues to deal with when you are standing in the middle of the road challenging a semi to run you over and a homeless man is trying to diffuse the situation.

Now - I am not saying I am without fault with my phone use.  I was trying to text and ride my bike once and nearly ran into a lamppost.  These things happen.  BUT - I can look at my phone and walk.  I look up every few seconds.  I am fine doing it.  I am WALKING - I am not going to hurt others.

SO - I can walk...on the WALK signal across the street while looking at my phone and WHO are YOU- person trying to make a right on a red to say I can't?

Blind people can cross the road on a walk on a walk signal.   So guess what?  I can too! I can look at my dandy phone and never look up and do it.  I can be fucking blindfolded while taking pictures of your irate honking ass and crawl across the street!  Sorry I am impeding your right on red - but do you see that lit up man in the international sign for walking?  That is for me!  I GET TO WALK before you get to turn. 

I can do what ever the fuck I want in this crosswalk while that illumitaed man is up saying I can go and YOU right-on-red must wait.

Maybe I'm going to juggle.  I am going to juggle as I cross the road.  Is that going to piss you off? 

Maybe I will get a catfish and a sharp knife and fillet that fucker as I cross the road.  Is that cool?  I am going to fillet a fucking fish as I walk across the street.  It is my god damn American right to do so.

I am going to create and then eat the most amazing ice cream sundae EVER as I walk across the road (time permitting).

Next time I cross the road I will get a peacock, put it in a bird-hold (whatever that is) and de-feather it as I cross the road. 

I am going to bring my laundry and pre-treat any stains with SHOUT.  I am going to SHOUT it OUT in the crosswalk.  You like that better than me looking at my phone?

You into origami?  I am going to stop in the lane closest to your turning and make about 10 origami cranes of various colors

Is all that shit cool?  Great looking at my phone shouldn't be a big deal. 

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